The Genius of Jandek

“And by the way, lately you’ve been listening to the worst music I’ve ever heard”. This is one of the final bits of dialog an ex girlfriend hit me with before our break up. I was listening to “You Painted Your Teeth” off of a record called Telegraph Melts By a man named Jandek. He and a woman are heard wailing “you painted your teeth, don’t paint your teeth” while sloppy nonsensical drums blare and discordant guitars are strummed haphazardly. As it turns out, most everything the man and his band plays follows this messy anti-formula, and with 52 releases there’s plenty to go around.

Considered an “Outsider Musician” (joining a category shared by Daniel Johnston and the late Wesley Willis to name a few), Jandek has been releasing these mysterious records since the late 70’s. Originally dubbed “The Units”( No relation to the late 70’s – early 80’s San Francisco Synth punk band “The Units”), Jandek (who is more commonly referred to as the man and the project rather than the project as a whole), has been operating a record label called Corwood Industries out of Houston Texas the entire time.

Some say his real name is Sterling Richard Smith, and he’s about 64 years old now. How true that is, I do not know. Super-fans have researched his business license for Corwood Industries and sure enough, Sterling Richard Smith is on the bill. There is a shroud of mystery that cloaks Jandek’s music. Some say that his low profile is an intentional statement on the purity of faceless music as previously demonstrated by bands such as The Residents. Some interpret his image as a real and honest result of being a passionate yet reclusive musician. Jandek rarely interviews, has rarely been photographed until recently, and keeps out of the mainstream media for the most part.

In 2004, Jandek began playing live. Many thought it was a hoax until they saw him in the flesh and realized that the event was an undeniable truth. He hasn’t stopped playing yet and is even rumored to be playing in Portugal tomorrow, January 10th 2009.

I have managed to obtain several of his scarce vinyl releases. I have about twenty of them, most of which are still sealed. The few that I have that are opened and listenable give me enough of a peek into this man’s brain to last a lifetime. Take a look at the album covers, the red haired man is Jandek himself; a truly marvelous concept.

“Jandek’s not pretentious, but only pretentious people like his music”. – Kurt Cobain, Spin magazine 1993.




















Every Single Release is still in print today on Corwood Industries (on CD only) with the exception of Ready For The House which is available on JackPot Records. All other vinyl realeases are out of print. When ordering direct from Corwood, make sure you go all out and take advantage of the 50% off deal when buying twenty (20) or more CDs. That’s twenty CDs for $80.00. The shipping is on Jandek too! Pretty Righteous.

Discography:

0739: Ready for the House (1978)
0740: Six and Six (1981)
0741: Later On (1981)
0742: Chair Beside a Window (1982)
0743: Living in a Moon So Blue (1982)
0744: Staring at the Cellophane (1982)
0745: Your Turn to Fall (1983)
0746: The Rocks Crumble (1983)
0747: Interstellar Discussion (1984)
0748: Nine-Thirty (1985)
0749: Foreign Keys (1985)
0750: Telegraph Melts (1986)
0751: Follow Your Footsteps (1986)
0752: Modern Dances (1987)
0753: Blue Corpse (1987)
0754: You Walk Alone (1988)
0755: On the Way (1988)
0756: The Living End (1989)
0757: Somebody in the Snow (1990)
0758: One Foot in the North (1991)
0759: Lost Cause (1992)
0760: Twelfth Apostle (1993)
0761: Graven Image (1994)
0762: Glad to Get Away (1994)
0763: White Box Requiem (1996)
0764: I Woke Up (1997)
0765: New Town (1998)
0766: The Beginning (1999)
0767: Put My Dream on This Planet (2000)
0768: This Narrow Road (2001)
0769: Worthless Recluse (2001)
0770: I Threw You Away (2002)
0771: The Humility of Pain (2002)
0772: The Place (2003)
0773: The Gone Wait (2003)
0774: Shadow of Leaves (2004)
0775: The End of It All (2004)
0776: The Door Behind (2004)
0777: A Kingdom He Likes (2004)
0778: When I Took That Train (2005)
0780: Raining Down Diamonds (2005)
0781: Khartoum (2005)
0782: Khartoum Variations (2006)
0784: What Else Does the Time Mean (2006)
0787: The Ruins of Adventure (2006)
0790: The Myth of Blue Icicles (2008)

Live:

0779: Glasgow Sunday (2005)
0783: Newcastle Sunday (2006)
0785: Glasgow Monday (2006)
0786: Austin Sunday (2006)
0788: Manhattan Tuesday (2007)
0789: Brooklyn Wednesday (2007)
0791: Glasgow Friday (2008)
0792: Glasgow Sunday 2005 (2008)

The Vinyl Countdown

I’ve been a collector for as long as I can remember. As a young kid I clearly recall an enthusiasm surrounding a paint variation on a Hotwheels® car. Something about having two of the same thing with a slight variant really sparked interest in me. I later began collecting baseball cards and eventually comic books. The transition between my card and comic collecting was simple. Baseball cards had nothing to them. They were cheap two-sided pieces of cardboard that told a story about the player of a sports game. As I grew out of sports (and ultimately social situations as well), I fell for comic books. Comic books were fun to collect, but they also offered this other level of collectibility; you could read them too! This far surpassed the simple two-dimensional world of trading cards and I quickly accumulated more long boxes of comics than I knew what to do with.
When the early nineties hit and every kid my age at the time (12-15 years old) was collecting comics, it began to lose it’s luster. At that time the markets were cashing in on the kids and their desire to collect everything. Comics had foil covers, cover variants, holograms, etc., etc. At this point kids (as well as I) were buying one of each, regardless of the contents. As the marketing tricks got trickier and more obvious, the stories in the books got worse and the designs and techniques became lazier. This is where I left to collect action figures. Ironically enough, I bought my first Admiral Ackbar Kenner® Star Wars action figure at a comic book store. It was a mere five bucks and did not include his commander’s staff. I quickly became hooked on figures and continued on to work at completing various lines from the 1970’s-early 1990’s. From Micronauts to carded X-men figures (still dwelling on my abandoned comic past), I managed to fill three separate rooms (and closets) at my parents home in central Jersey. To this day I still have about 60-70% of everything I ever bothered to hoard.
I loved the hunt for action figures so much that I went and got a job at Toys R Us. It was 1994 now, and right around the corner was the new (and long awaited) Kenner/Hasbro Star Wars action figure line. I collected them frantically, taking bribes from parents around Christmas time to get them the highly sought after Princess Leia figure. It was early that next year that the same thing happened to the action figure market. Kenner/Hasbro was well aware of and prepared to target the insane Star Wars fanatics and their dedication to collecting. Not to mention the history involving obsessive Star Wars freaks fighting over accidental style variations (based on the plant they were painted/packaged in). With this knowledge the company went ahead and put out so many figures with so many variations that kids like me couldn’t afford to get half of them with our minimum wage paychecks. So the inevitable happened – The market collapsed and people lost interest.
I went on to collect other things that somehow remain in demand to this day, but of all the things I ever got my head wrapped around, record collecting is the final destination.
This past year I read an article that really caught my attention. The article was called “The Vinyl Record Bubble?” by Joe Steinhardt, owner of Don Giovanni Records. His article beautifully details his concern for what he calls the inevitable collapse of the collectable vinyl market. His statistics and findings are very impressive and to me, they were somewhat troubling at first. He cites figures and instances such as the comic industry’s failure to revive itself to that pinnacle some of us got to experience in the mid 90’s. He talks about how the record industry is getting greedy and this historical pattern of collapse (or bubble burst) is in full effect. After reading the article several times over, it was hard to not feel convinced that records were about to become worthless.
This is where I realized the difference between what some people and I consider “value” or “worth”.
Of all the music mediums ever available, Vinyl is the only one that always stands strong. Think about it. Reel to reel, cassettes, eight tracks, mini discs, and now CDs (to name a few dying or dead species). Vinyl (or phonograph record I should say) has been around for over 150 years now. It’s not going anywhere and here’s why. There are people who have been feverishly collecting these things for decades. The artwork size, the sound, the consistency in their easily stored sizes and weight, and the nearly infinite available library is enough to keep collectors hooked for a long, long time. Technology can’t step to records either. Audiophiles, or “Golden Ears” claim the sound is superior to all media and their heavy equipment receipts are proof positive of these beliefs.. So collectibility, superior sound quality, and a history of success and satisfied listeners has led me to believe that records will stand strong as the silent leader of music media well past our lifetimes.
The issue is with the market. The industry knows that music consumers aren’t just buying mp3s right now. They are aware that more than a handful of kids are out there buying all six versions/colors of the latest punk release. I actually agree that a collapse is inevitable as it was with all previously flooded collectable markets. I don’t believe that it will affect the real collectors and the real listeners. There may come a time when no one cares which pressing you have of that Gainesville band’s LP from 2007, and by the looks of the market, that time could come soon. But as for value, there are still only so many butcher covers by the Beatles and everyday there are tons of new Beatles fans born. It doesn’t matter what people decide to press now or later because the demand for the original will always obtain the highest return. People aren’t going to ignore the nostalgia associated with flipping a classic slab of wax over on their turntable while losing themselves in larger than life layouts. It’s the kids that care more about having more of everything (versus the kids who care about finding more in everything), who will be affected here. If you collect and spend money for the wrong reasons (to be the ultimate fan – materialistic fan), burst your own bubble. I’m planning on teaching my grandkids about the one and only perfect sound, available now and forever on 45 or LP.

The Dickies!

Dickies @ Southpaw
Park Slope Brooklyn
Friday, 01/03/09

We found a spot about fifty feet from the front door of Southpaw which definitely helped shape the evening. Beer was cheap and cold, and the crowd grew from about 20 people to over 200 people in a matter of minutes. First band to go on was Kitty and the Kowalskis. Girl fronted pop punk/rock that was just average. Not to mention, every time they opened their mouths between songs, they said something that embarrassed me for them.

The Dickies came out to a triumphant drum line. Stan Lee got a huge cheer as did Leonard. The rest of the band was kind of “blah boring” with the exception of the tripped out bass playing gummy bear. (if you were there you know what I am talking about). The band began by sharing their enthusiasm for playing in Queens. Obviously they were not in Queens, so this stirred up the BK kids. Anyway, Their banter was hilarious: from gay jokes to creative improv including a Q&A session (while SL was fixing a shorted amp) that left me cracking up. Then there was the performance. I was very impressed with the sound and the tightness they demonstrated. Leonard did his famous “middle finger in the ear to keep my tone straight” the entire show. Other times he accentuated his lankiness by jumping around flailing his arms and letting his shaggy hair mess his face up. SL was quite active as usual too, throwing his guitar all over the place yet never missing a note. I'd go as far as to say he is one of the greatest leads in punk but that’s another story all together. The songs they picked were perfect, and there were a TON of them. As a man living with ADD, I generally cannot pay full attention start to finish during any concert but this one captured my brain and my heart from the time the curtain opened until it closed. Knights in White Satin sounded fabulous, eat your heart out Moody Blues…Keep on Rockin’ in the Free World made my night though. Can’t ever have me too much Neil Young. Only disappointment, No Fan Mail?!?? Best song ever, what gives? Otherwise it was an energetic, solid performance that left me feeling refreshed and confident in this pack of wild geniuses.

Set List:

Rosemary
Jim Bowie
I'm ok, You're ok
See My Way
Knights in White Satin
Got it at the store
Give it back
Paranoid
Waterslide
Manny Moe and Jack
My Pop the Cop
You Drive Me Ape (You Big Gorilla)
Going Homo
Poodle Party
I'm a Chollo
If Stuart Could Talk
Gigantor

ENCORE

Keep on Rockin’ in the Free World
Bannana Splits

Special Thanks to James D for being able to name that tune about 15 notes before I ever can!

2009

Here we go with another year behind us, blah blah blah, and all that. We hung out at my friends Miserable and Lina's wonderful home in Keyport, NJ for New Year's Eve. It was a fun old time. I got to see a wide array of folks I haven't spent enough time with lately. (Pictured from L-R is Sean "The Rebel" Pendelton, Dan Santoro, and Yours Truly). It was a great night, picked up a guitar with some friends for a while and improvised on some bluegrass, shot the breeze with old friends, and played a game where someone would name any item and you would have to cite a memory to go along with it. We got pretty wild but I actually took it easier than usual this year and by chance I ate a cookie that was baked with almonds. I'm very allergic to nuts and needless to say, it was a scary situation. It didn't realize it until early the next day. I was up late with severe abdominal pain and the sweats. In the morning when I was on my way home I noticed my face was really, really pale. I got home, showered and started puking like a maniac. I realized then that my heart was being affected. This happened three times in the past for me. Once when I was eating swordfish at age 8. I got hives, irregular heartbeat, and the sweats. Ended up in the ER with adrenaline shots out the ying-yang. Another time I ate shrimp when I was 13 and found out the hard way that I can't really have any seafood. That was scary. Same deal- Emergency Room with all kinds of goodies being pumped into me. Then there was a time just a few years ago where I accidentally drank my friend's beer. He had a New Castle beer which is a nut brown ale. Well whatever nuts it had in it nearly killed me. I stayed up with this crazy irregular heartbeat for like an entire night and into the next night. Like and idiot, I didn't go to the hospital that time. Then there was yesterday. After realizing what was going on, I texted my roommates (who were sleeping at the time) and told them "Hey I'm having a reaction, can you make sure I am ok?" So I tried to sleep it off but it's hard to sleep when your heart is beating a thousand miles out of your chest and stopping periodically for a split second then rushing to catch up. Not to mention the fact that it is absolutely horrifying and makes you nauseous as all hell. So around 6:30 last night I woke up and hung out on the couch while my roomies watched TV and just waited. My heart was a little better, but still every time I got up it sped up and flipped and flopped and hurt. It was terrible. My roomies kept insisting that I go to the hospital or call my mom (the nurse) and I just waited it out. Pretty silly, but my new year's resolution includes a very serious diet adjustment. I decided this was the last time that this was ever going to happen. Stay tuned for some great music thoughts (including a new interview) in the next couple of days.